Teaching in the trenches

So how do you teach a woman how to please you? A tricky question with a lot of subtle nuance. Being in a position to tell someone something that could trainwreck your relationship is never easy. How you actually do it might mean the difference in keeping the relationship alive and sending it spiraling down the proverbial toilet.

It all starts with a kiss doesn't it? The approach, the first contact with your lips. The hunger, the passion, the delicate nature of your lips and tongues exploring each other. Creating greater passion and need in the other. Heart racing faster and faster. If your partner doesn't kiss well, most people would simply end things. However, does it need to be that way? Can you teach someone a new way to kiss? A new way to approach that most basic of sexual interactions?

The way they touch you, the things they say, the way they move. We've all had the fuck of our lives. Can you teach someone how to truly please you when they have been having sex for a decade or more? Are people trainable or do they go through life with the same sexual style and techniques? To be used over and over again.

We've all heard that many women fake orgasm. We saw it effectively demonstrated years ago in When Harry Met Sally. Yes, I'll have what she's having. Maybe women fake orgasm because their partners don't take the time to find out what really pleases their partner and then further be willing to execute to that need. To put aside the male need to simply Rut. That in itself can be hot and result in amazing sex for both partners, but who wants a jack hammer all the time? Who wants to be one?

I'm very serious in this question. How can I approach a woman to help her understand my needs without making her feel like she's a failure at sex? Do I have to say it? Are there ways to simply guide her to new places and methods? Hmmm... then there is the old adage that you never really understand something until you teach someone else. Food for my own thought.